The Bogeyman..

This is a short tale, told to my by a friend, whilst we were making our way into town for a spot of Christmas shopping, one cold and windy morning..

Shortly after hearing this story, I relayed it to my wife, however, upon posting her reactions to the tale on FaceBook, curiosity got the better of some of my friends, so after many enquiries, I've decided to repeat the tale, only this time on my blog, for the benefit of my curious friends..

By the way, if this does'nt make you cringe, you have a will of steel:

I went shopping on Tuesday/Wednesday (or something) and while I was travelling into town in the taxi, I picked Andy up - I had Jessica (my 2 year old daughter) on my knee, and she had a runny nose.

As a result of these circumstances, it reminded Andy of something that he witnessed whilst visiting Wainhouse Tower with his kids.

One cold day, Andy is at the top of Wainhouse Tower during one of the attractions 'open days' when, next to him he sees this guy, who, himself has two young children with him, however, due to the cold temperature combined with the added altitude of the building itself, he's in that all too familiar scenario where his kids are suffering from the nasal 'nostril candle' problem.

Andy notices that the guy is checking his pockets, and looking around frantically for a tissue, or something similar as a solution to this rather messy and embarrassing predicament, and as he's doing so, his frantic actions are beginning to attract the attention of Andy, his kids, and of course, the other visitors...

Eventually, he realises that there is nothing he can do, he has no hanker-chief, or tissues to hand, and due to the physical properties of the tower, there's no available bathroom so the unfortunate parent had to take drastic measures, so this is what he did, much to the surprise of his children, Andy, and of course, the attentive view of the other tourists..

Using his mouth, he covered the nostrils of his kids, and with a quick sucking motion, and a rather loud 'sluuuurp' he gathered the contents of his childrens nasal excretions, then with a quick flick of his neck, he swiftly dispatched the gooey gumball over the side of the safaty barrier, into the wooded depths below. Nice.

As you can imagine, the combined reactions of Andy, and the other visitors was quite funny, in a gross and hilarious fashion.

It still brings a rather gruesome lump to my throat, everytime I think of this story, and as you can imagine, Sarah felt the same way when I passed on this legendary tale to her.

It's hard to relay the story in written form, but hopefully I've done a decent enough job, and as a result, it would'nt suprised me if you now feel the same way too hahah.