DK - Life Behind Bars

How Time Flies!

2010-10-27T07:03:00.000+01:00

As if it's been almost THREE MONTHS since my last update!

I suppose time flies when you're having fun eh? or in my case, a change of career. You see, for those of you who don't know, I'm no longer to be found behind a DJ stand anymore, because I've relocated to working behind the bars, instead of in front of them..

Not in a barman sense mind, y'see, I'm a manager now - I'm the gaffer at one of Halifax's newest clubs, situated above my original residency on Silver Street. Fusion's the name, and clubbing's the game I suppose.

It all started out just over 6 weeks ago, and, surprisingly, it's turning out to be quite fun! I'm up a lot earlier in the mornings than I'd like to be, but yeah, overall, despite the occasional late night, the jobs great, and a lot easier than I originally imagined.

Thankfully, we're only open 2 nights a weekend at the moment, which is great, because it gives me a chance to get used to the place at my own pace, which probably explains why I've managed to pick up the job so quickly, I imagine if we were to be open 7 days a week, like your average bar, then things could get a whole lot trickier!

This Halloween will definitely put my skills to the test though, as I imagine we're in for a double-whammy, with Halloween falling on the Sunday, there's a pretty good chance that Friday and Saturday night's gonna be mental. What's more, is I've decided to stick 2 gala events on at this weekend too. So there's the Elemental bouncy night on the Friday for our younger clubbers, and my own Cheeky! event, on the Saturday, which should keep the older end satisfied - what's more, I'm partaking in the PA too, so let's just hope we don't run out of beer and change while I'm up on stage eh?

So yeah, apart from the new job, I've not really been able to do much else, apart from work some more on the Shibden picture, which is coming on great by the way, oh, and there's a new twist to the carved pumpkins - all of which shall be revealed on Friday heheh!

So, until then, wish me luck, and I'll see you all on the other side of Halloween, that is of course, if the zombies don't get me first!

Until next month..
DK.

It's been a while!

2010-07-27T08:03:00.000+01:00

Hello again, welcome back to my Blog. I know it's been quite some time, but I've been side-tracked something rotten over the past few months!!

So, what's been happening in the life of DK that's so important I hear you ask.. Well, for starters, My wife's sister got married recently (congrats David & Amy!) and I was responsible for their photography, I've been playing full-time house-husband for the children who are on holiday from school for 6 weeks (a hand-full believe me!), and I've had the odd job or two come my way (a couple of new residencies and some one-off events to sort out!

So yeah, I either haven't had the time to update the Blog, been that occupied with other things, or I've simply forgotten!

Anyway, on top of that, I have some great news. After about 8 or so years, Now that I have a clearer schedule, It gives me great pleasure to announce the return of my Halifax event 'Cheeky!'

What's even greater news, is that we're back in our hometown of Halifax - the venue's confirmed for all of the remaining Bank Holidays in 2010, and there's definitely scope for the rest of 2011 too. The location is totally hush-hush at the moment, purely for non-competitive purposes, easier marketing, and because I don't need the headache of other people trying to step on my toes. So, until it's nearer the time, my Cheeky! members will be the first to find out about the event. Also, on the night, there will be no flyers, posters or any physical marketing of the night, so if you want in, you have to see me for a ticket.

That said, once our first night is completed, and the word's out where we are, then I'm sure that I'll be making other arrangements for the overall running of the event, so stay tuned ok?

In other news, I've finally begun to sort out various other projects, I can actually move in the studio now! - and I found it quite therapeutic too, I'd highly recommend anyone to spend a day or two, having a good sort out, bin loads of stuff you know you dont need, and relax in the resulting open space where that great big pile of junk used to be!!

I'm back on the illustrative path too! - since my new years resolution post at the beginning of the year, I've managed to finish one huge panoramic picture, and I'm currently in the process of working on my next piece, an A2 pencil drawing of Shibden Hall.

DJ wise, I'm still doing my bit at The Acapulco Nightclub on a Thursday, Fridays I'm helping out at a venue near Brighouse, and Saturdays, you can still find me having a mad one at Bar Fifteen.

Speaking of events, there's also scope for a new Sunday night that's come to my attention recently, if anything comes of it, you'll be the first to know!

In the meantime, keep checking back on my blog for further updates, news on any other projects, and maybe even a few inside secrets, after all, you never know what could happen next in this crazy world we live in!

Until next time - adios!
DK.

Mad March, Madder Fridays!

2010-03-01T08:20:00.001Z

This snow has finally gone, converted to rain and warmer too! - I can almost feel the summer already!!

This is great for everyone, because now, people are venturing outside again, nights are getting busier in Halifax and new events are kicking off all over the place..

Speaking of new events, I did the first Friday ever at 'The Groove' (formerly Jumpin' Jaks) and what a cracker that was!! - absolutely bouncing, and a great way to kick off this Springs entertainment!

Also, some of you may be pleased to hear that 2 months into the resolutions post in January, I've nearly completed the first of my main resolutions, which was to have completed a large piece of artwork for my wall, as I type this, I'm looking at what can only be described as a colossal drawing on my wall, which, when framed, will look great in my front room.

Now it's just a matter of deciding what to draw next haha!

My music productions have taken a bit of a back seat at the moment, this is mainly due to a lot of new work that's come my way recently, so as you can imagine, I've had to give my clients priority, although, as soon as my clients work is complete, I'll be back 'on it' don't you worry!

Well, I hope March is just as good as the rest of the year so far, and I hope you're all having a great 2010 just like me and my family, see you all in April, where you can join me in my birthday celebrations, Easter, and much, much more! - watch this space!

Speak Soon
DK x

February Already!!

2010-02-01T14:01:00.000Z

The snow's finally melted, the recession is apparently over, and I've finally sorted my tunes out, hurray!! - Only took me a year..

Anyway, how many of you have kept to your resolutions? Did you finally renew that Gym membership, and actually use it, Have you quit smoking yet? or did you finally clean out the garage of junk, broken appliances and leaky paintpots?

Nah, me neither - however, there are a few bits that I've managed to keep on track..

Studio work begins this month, I've got my stuff set up exactly as I want it, so remixing begins this week. Looking forward to a finished product by the end of February!

I've started my new piece of artwork for the front room, it's going to take about 2 weeks to finish as it's absolutely huuuge (just over a metre wide, and a foot deep) - its a panaramic sketch of the Halifax town centre, where most of the clubs are, It'll look great when it's done.

Flash Game and animation, this is scheduled for later this year, as soon as my other projects are done (one thing at a time eh?) but I'm still making notes and preparing ideas between jobs.

What about the DJ work? I hear you ask, well, I'm still currently looking for a replacement for my Friday and Saturday night residency since the closure of The Cell, although I have been pleasantly suprised by the support of other workers in Halifax, putting me forward for work to their managers, and potential future clients, so there's a few promising leads, although nothing is confirmed yet. Until things are finalised, I'll keep myself to myself, but you'll all be the first to know once the ball gets rolling again!

The Acapulco Nightclub's going well, Me and Matty are having a ball with the Thursday night regulars, great bunch of nutters, and I'm finally finding my feet with their somewhat chaotic music policy hahaha!!

I recently popped in on a Sunday night at The Groove and helped out for a couple of hours, that was great fun, thoroughly enjoyed it, it was the first time I'd played a club classics set in a large club in ages - it was a nice change..

We've got the World Cup coming soon too, so I'm guessing it'll be time for me to dust off the old England Shirt, dig out the facepaint and get involved in the fever that follows.

Looking like it's going great in 2010 already, bring on the Summer because I really cannot wait!

Till next month, party safe people!
Dk

2010 is Here - It's Resolution Time!!

2010-01-02T08:07:00.000Z

Welcome To A New Decade - Time To Get Organised!

Quit Smoking, Don't Drink As much, Lose Weight, Find A Girlfriend/Boyfriend, Get A Life..

I'm sure these are some resolutions which have been made, and probably broken already. I for one, am a habitual resolution breaker myself, so this year I decided to push the envelope a little fuirther, being a new decade and all that..

This is because I'm spurred on a bit by the fact that I was actually quite organised for the first time ever in my life last year, having actually achieved quite a few of my past-yearly goals, so I'm now a believer of the old 'you can do anything if you put your mind to it' scenario.

"So if you're gonna do it, you may as well dive in head first and go for broke.." I'm currently thinking, so with that in mind, my resolutions for this year are (in no particular order) :

Write, and actually complete a game..
Procrastination has always been my weakness, more so, in the world of game development. I've written so many briefs, sketched so many ideas and planned so many scenarios, but this year, I really must get something out there, uploaded and actually played. For once.

Get back into creating artwork:
I've been a keen artist all my life, although my creative side was beginning to dwindle as I started clubbing more, I think that it's time I put a really thoughtful gift from my wife (an art set, with easel..) to use, and start sketching again.

Music is my life, so why not make music?
It's been said over and over again, I started last year, and again, I stopped - so this year, it's time to really get to work on my musical projects, the studio's ready, the kids are outta the way this year at school, so I really do think that it's about time I dusted off the Korg, sat down and get some material put together..

Animation..
As with the Game resolution, I'm thinking of killing a few birds with one stone by incorporating my music, animation and game creating resolutions into one big project..

Sort those MP3s out for Christ's sake!!
This is actually last years resolution, and I'm still on with it!! - it's probably the only one I've stuck to, it's simply taken me all year to do it haha!

Stop Drinking.
Yeah right, like that's ever gonna happen..

What have you guys got in mind? - let me know eh?
Happy New Year Everyone!
DK x

A New Decade Awaits, New Grounds To Cover...

2009-12-21T12:19:00.000Z

In December 2009, just before Christmas, I decided to wander about the interwebs and clean up all of my on-line profiles, mainly with sites where I have my many online accounts, usually featuring various uploads, music files and artwork etc.

Some of you will have probably received a message about this, featuring information about the cancellation of my Bebo and MySpace accounts.

There is no negative reason to my submissions being removed from the web by the way, I'm simply having 'Spring Clean' so to speak.

This is because, over the few years that I've been a member of so many sites, my submissions werent really suitable for some websites - remixes with other artists vocals etc, werent really suitable for other websites dedicated to making games etc.

So, as a result of my realisation to this, any future submissions will hopefully be made to be more suitable for other websites - I also look forward to maybe even hearing some of my work in future Flash files, animations or games!!

Don't panic though! - I will be re-uploading my submissions, once I've remixed the tracks (now that I have the correct software and studio setup) and the majority of my tracks will have been mastered to a better quality than previously - this is mainly to keep my work up to the standard of the work submitted by other users..

YouTube:
I will be updating all of my YouTube submissions shortly too - as with my muscial remixes, the videos will be remade, mainly to keep up with todays online technology such as the addition of better sound quality and of course, the appearance of so many HD videos.

NewGrounds:
I've been a keen member of NewGrounds for a few years now, and over this perios, I've always shown a keen interest in developing a few games and animations for this site, so I'm aiming at popping my NewGrounds animation cherry in 2010, and I hope you look forward to seeing some of my work as much as look forward to making it!

DJ Work:
As some of you may have seen in my many FaceBook status updates, I've been spending the majority of the year sorting out my vast MP3 collection. Again, this is a major overhaul of my music collection, aimed at my club classic tracks, so I can be a little more specific to the kind of classics I aim to play in the near future.

FaceBook:
I will remain with FaceBook, simply because of the majority of people using this site, common sense really is'nt it?

DeviantArt:
This account has been cancelled, mainly because I would rather keep any of my artwork on my website, purely for copyright reasons.

Twitter:
This account is staying as it it, I mean, there's not that much to Twitter is there really?..

Apart from that, I'm in for a pretty quiet new year with the family - but I'm looking forward to it already as I have a few other exciting projects coming up in the New Year.

So, roll on 2K10 eh? - and I hope everyone has a Very Merry Christmas, And A Completely Mental New year.

Happy Holidays Everyone
DK.

Leave a comment! | Share this

The Bogeyman..

2009-12-15T15:40:00.000Z

This is a short tale, told to my by a friend, whilst we were making our way into town for a spot of Christmas shopping, one cold and windy morning..

Shortly after hearing this story, I relayed it to my wife, however, upon posting her reactions to the tale on FaceBook, curiosity got the better of some of my friends, so after many enquiries, I've decided to repeat the tale, only this time on my blog, for the benefit of my curious friends..

By the way, if this does'nt make you cringe, you have a will of steel:

I went shopping on Tuesday/Wednesday (or something) and while I was travelling into town in the taxi, I picked Andy up - I had Jessica (my 2 year old daughter) on my knee, and she had a runny nose.

As a result of these circumstances, it reminded Andy of something that he witnessed whilst visiting Wainhouse Tower with his kids.

One cold day, Andy is at the top of Wainhouse Tower during one of the attractions 'open days' when, next to him he sees this guy, who, himself has two young children with him, however, due to the cold temperature combined with the added altitude of the building itself, he's in that all too familiar scenario where his kids are suffering from the nasal 'nostril candle' problem.

Andy notices that the guy is checking his pockets, and looking around frantically for a tissue, or something similar as a solution to this rather messy and embarrassing predicament, and as he's doing so, his frantic actions are beginning to attract the attention of Andy, his kids, and of course, the other visitors...

Eventually, he realises that there is nothing he can do, he has no hanker-chief, or tissues to hand, and due to the physical properties of the tower, there's no available bathroom so the unfortunate parent had to take drastic measures, so this is what he did, much to the surprise of his children, Andy, and of course, the attentive view of the other tourists..

Using his mouth, he covered the nostrils of his kids, and with a quick sucking motion, and a rather loud 'sluuuurp' he gathered the contents of his childrens nasal excretions, then with a quick flick of his neck, he swiftly dispatched the gooey gumball over the side of the safaty barrier, into the wooded depths below. Nice.

As you can imagine, the combined reactions of Andy, and the other visitors was quite funny, in a gross and hilarious fashion.

It still brings a rather gruesome lump to my throat, everytime I think of this story, and as you can imagine, Sarah felt the same way when I passed on this legendary tale to her.

It's hard to relay the story in written form, but hopefully I've done a decent enough job, and as a result, it would'nt suprised me if you now feel the same way too hahah.

Times Change, As Do Careers...

2009-10-07T09:20:00.000+01:00

Imagine working on a bar somewhere, you're doing the usual routine, cleaning glasses, eyeing up women (or men if you're either the opposite sex or of an 'alternative' nature)or cashing up the till, when for some bizarre reason, your boss thinks it's a good idea to cuts a few costs, and maybe quite entertaining in the process to stick you on a stage in front of 1200 people for a couple of nights..

Well, boys and girls, that's what happened to me nearly 15 years ago. Bizarrely enough, it was that sequence of events which changed my career completely, as I went from Typesetting and Design Office Bloke to Barman, to DJ in an instant. I've done it ever since, and I guess, as a bonus, it brought me to meet the new wife, so it's all good really..

As I said before, that's how it all happened for me, and 15 years, 2 children and a marriage later - I'm beginning to believe that I've achieved everything in that particular field of entertainment, and maybe it's time to look at something different.

The question is, what? - do I go back to the bars, maybe even a spot of management, maybe a bit of promotions, or even go back to promoting my own events? - Who knows, but I think it's getting to the time where I need to take a break from the decks, and maybe do something new.

So come Christmas, I'm looking at alternative options, maybe I should put my NLC Level 1 and 2 Qualifications to good use, and take to the bars again, or even dust off my Food Hygiene bits and get to work in the kitchens.

I'm still unsure of what to do next, so when I have a moment of realisation - I'm sure you'll all find out sooner or later.

Wish me luck eh?
Dk x

Going Back To Basics..

2009-08-02T11:11:00.001+01:00

Come Thursday night, it looks like I'll be back right where I started, and to be honest, I cannot wait..

Let me explain..

On Friday, I was chatting in the smoking area to a few of our regulars at the Cell, when one of our security lads (cheers Dee!) pops over and asks me to pop down to Liquid after work. 'Liquid' I ask him' - the returning nod confirmed I had'nt gone slightly mad.

Anyway, fast-forward a few hours, and there I am in that very familiar all-blue reception area, awaiting some attention from the management.

Eventually, after a few moments, I'm quietly ushered upstairs, into an area that greets me like an old friend.

Y'see bloggers, I have'nt been to Maine Street since I worked behind the bar there for well over a decade, and the sight that presented itself to me brought back a whole era of old memories from yesteryear which kinda made me feel all warm and cosy inside.

The reason for this, is because Maine Street has'nt changed. Not one bit, well, apart from a couple of cosmetic tweaks here and there, it's practically as it was all those years ago in the nineties. The music, the layout, the punters, everything. This is a good thing, as I feel Maine Street has become one of Halifax's timeless venues, which thankfully, has escaped the wrath of progression, technology and novelty refurbishments.

Going back to the original reason for this blog, however, the reason why I was in the club in the first place, is because the management have decided to bring me on board to kick-start their Thursday nights..

I've had a few colleagues comment on this new opportunity, some saying 'It's not your kinda place Dannie' or 'But you're a dance DJ' etc. etc. - but many people don't realise the history I've had with this venue.

Maine Street is where it all began for me, many years ago, back in the Brit Pop era, Spice Girls were everywhere, there were no such thing as 'dance sets' and there was a bloody great tree in the middle of the dancefloor. I began my first party sets here, I worked behind the bar here, I used to sweep that floor at the end of the night, and I still have nightmares about that crocodile above the bar.

So putting all my previous experience in the dance circuit, classics events, and other madness aside - I'll be spending most of my week digging through my old party classics, dusting off the Motown, Cheesy Chart, Britpop and even a slice of Elvis.

Bring on Thursday, that's what I say - and bring your flares with you!!

Maine Street.
Nothing Changed. Nothing Lost.

Bassline, Gadgets, FaceNazis, Punjacks & Pennydrops

2009-07-21T12:39:00.000+01:00

Well hello again my fellow internetties! - welcome to another installation of my Blog. I know it's been a while, but all with good reason...

I have decided to write my blogs on a less than regular basis in comparison to my previous scrawlings, mainly because a lot of stuff I ramble about online usually appears either on my Twitter page, or my FaceBook status updates - the result being that replying to everyone's responses end up taking more time than it does to create a blog about them.

This is about to change however, due to the latest addition to FaceBook, which reared it's ugly head to me last Tuesday - hence the next section:

---------------------------------------------------------------

FaceBook - Your Freedom, by Our Rules
I received a message from FB telling me that my status update section on my profile is not a chat client, despite there being a function where other readers can react to whatever it is that you may have posted...

So, this new addition to FaceBook (which incidentally appeared very shortly after the popularity of Twitter hit the headlines..) is something that's designed to keep up with the various trends which are doing the rounds on the internet.

Talk about online real-estate greed, I can just imagine the creative department at FB towers now:

MD: "Okay guys, Twitter's popular, we need to do something about this now.."

Exec: "Well, we've got status updates, which is basically twitter anyway, why don't we just re-word it and put something like 'What's on your mind' - It's a bit close to the bone, copyright wise, but hey, fuck it, we're FaceBook, we can do what we want""

MD: "Yeah, great idea - go for it, and while you're at it - make sure there's a character count similar to Twitter, but give em' more! - that's sure to make us more popular than Twitter!!.."

Fast forward a few weeks/months later and..

MD: "Er guys, we've got a problem - people are using the status updates more than the FB chat client.."

Exec: "Yeah, we know - that's cause people can say what's on their mind, and their friends can respond, with the addition of being able to leave their thoughts or debates open without having to save, or keep open a chat window, it's great is'nt it, in fact it's probably better than Twitter cause you don't have to 'retweet' - it's great is'nt it? - and it abolishes the need for forums, guestbooks and comments!!"

MD: "But that's what we've got the chat for! - stop them at once!!"

Exec: "But we thought that was the whole poin.. oh never mind!!"

MD: "And while we're at it, we should let people post YouTube links into their status updates too, and web pages - that'd be great!!"

Exec: But what about spamming, and er, isnt that what the Videos and Links section is for? - besides, don't we kinda OWN YouTube, can't we just put a YouTube section there inste.. oh never mind."

---------------------------------------------------------------

DJ Gadgetry, and Live PAs
I've recently just bought one of these: Behringer BCD3000

I know it's only a MIDI controller, and DJ's have been using controllers to mix for a while, be it a simple MIDI mixer or something more advanced like the Allen & Heath Xone MIDI mixer, but for what I've done with it so far, it seems to be catching on.

The reason for this, I'm guessing, is that I'm not mixing dance music with it - I'm mixing chart music, or dare I say it 'party'

Now, when I originally came up with the idea a while ago (Flashback to August 2008: 'Y'know, everyone mixes dance music nowadays, what happened to all the chart mixes?') a lot of the reactions from my DJ colleagues was somewhat mixed (pardon the pun) Some were like 'yeah, that'd work' and others looked at me like I was start raving mad, but since my purchase of my magic black box, it seems the majority are well and truly convinced of it's usefulness.

Especially when I turn up for work with just one bag, two wires and I'm ready to roll..

There has been a few issues with it though - it took me about 8 days to get the damn thing working, and due to the amount of DJs who, after seeing what I can do with this thing, have now purchased one themselves - are running into similar issues, I offer this advice:

If you do use a laptop with Vista, you HAVE to set it up for Audio playback - Go to the Native Instruments website (they designed Traktor, which comes with the controller) - there's a page that lists how to do this step by step..

The main component to my trusty behringer, is not the software that comes with it - Traktor (LE or otherwise) is a nightmare, its beatmapping is atrocious and you can't leave it unattended for long or your timings will leave you high & dry.

Use PCDJ or in my case, Virtual DJ instead.

Do NOT use a PC with Vista on it, and make sure your PC/laptop is used only for your DJ work, so stick your Office stuff and downloads somewhere else. You have been warned.

Happy mixing!

---------------------------------------------------------------

Ladies and Gentlemen, I Give You - The 'Punjack' or 'PennyDrop'
You have idea what I'm talking about do you? - well, let me explain...

Before the days of FaceNazi, Bebo and the like - surfers communicated via the use of forums, messageboards and guestbooks. These are, in todays world redesigned to fit in with the modern day equivalent which are the conline community sites.

Anyway, in the past, if there was a particular subject discussed in a forum, you got one of many typical responses, of which usually consisted of:

a:) A 'real' response, where the poster leaves something genuine, or a sensible post which reads well, and suits it's subject matter to the letter.

b:) A 'flame' - something offensive, either directed at the original threads author, subject matter or other users, mainly to either get a volatile response, or to cause' some kind of dispute.

c:) A 'threadjack' - where the poster would add something which moves the direction of the conversation from it's original subject, onto something completely different. (Say there's a post about Manchester United Football Club, someone posts about going to Manchester which then results in everyone else replying about Manchester as a city, night out or whatever..)

d:) A 'wallypost' ie: Someone who just puts 'FIRST!' just because they happened to be there at the time when the subject was raised..

Well, I've grown addicted to a new kind of post, something which I refer to as a 'PunJack' - it's not as frustrating as a thread jack, but the idea is thus:

A 'Punjack' is a reply to a thread in a forum or messageboard, that does'nt cause' any malicious harm, remains in context of the original subject, reads as a genuine post from a personal point of view, with the exeption of drawing the reader into the story until the very end, where the pun is placed - a joke of epically bad proportions in which the reader realises they've been had, thus 'the penny drops'

The best place to witness this online phenomenon, is on B3ta in the QOTW (question of the week) - see if you can spot them, as well as enjoyig some of the users posts, it really does make interesting readng.

In due time, I will actually posts some of my submissions that have been made in the past.

Summer Shenanagans and Tune Obsessions

2009-05-28T10:54:00.000+01:00

Hooray, the Summer is here, (with exception to the occasional mandatory downpour) the nights are getting later, and the race is on with the bars to get everyone's drinking dollars before the Holiday season truly kicks in. As a result, there appears to be a lot going on in our small town, as new nights are beginning to pop up..

The big names are appearing on various banners and blackboards. The cars, vans and trailers festooned with Flyposters for the clubs are back and there's another tide of stag nights, hen nights and birthday parties in fancy dress arriving by the many stretch limosines that still continue to find Bull Green roundabout hard to negotiate on a Saturday night.

As the late-night schedules kick into gear for the Summer, the competition will certainly be fierce, and it will result in a cracking build up to that ever important night - the August Bank Holiday Sunday. Either way the clubbers can look forward to a very interesting 12 or so weeks in Halifax.

Speaking of big nights, The Tube has recently celebrated it's 10th Anniversary, which by Halifax standards is a very long time for an independent venue. It's not long before Chicago reaches their 1st Birthday and if I'm not mistaken, Lush's birthday bash is due anytime soon, so the clubbers can expect a few more mega events in the next couple of months from these venues.

Bar Eleven have also been upping the ante, as over the past couple of months they've featured the likes of Graeme Park, Brandon Block and Marshall Jefferson to their weekend line-ups, and this week they've got the frontman from Embrace headlining at the bar for what appears to be yet another potential killer of an all-nighter.

In other circles, it appears that the live entertainment side of our town is picking up as we've recently seen a Burlesque night at Bar 15, The all day live event featuring 9 live bands is due soon at the bar in Bull Green. Another night I'd definetly recommend for entertainment value is the big one at Jaks featuring the lads from Dirty Sanchez, if you're easily offended then make sure you're in the front row hahaha!!

There are many other live music events cropping all over Halifax at the moment too - it's almost like festival season has come early this year.

What I've also noticed in Halifax too, is that finally after many years, there are now a lot more places open late on a Thursday, The Cell now opens until 2am, Yates' are open late, The Tube now open until 5am and Lush is still up there with Liquid, Jaks and of course the notorious Barbarellas.

In the meantime, prior to all this chaos, I've been trying to take advantage of this pre-summer quiet period to do some in-house organizing...

Tube Obsession Disorder:
As many of you who read my status updates will notice, I seem to spend a lot of time 'sorting out my classics' - this is something which, when I started, looked like it was going to be a simple process, however, little did I know about the Iceberg that looms below the hidden depths of my record collection.

What I was trying to achieve, was to overcome a symptom that I like to call 'MP3 Hoarding Syndrome' - an ailment that I'm sure a lot of DJs besides myself suffer from, on a regular basis.

This is where a DJ comes across a collection of MP3s, whilst searching for one track, and then fails to resist the temptation of 'copying the lot - just in case'

This results in a folder with hundreds, if not thousands of MP3 files that gradually builds up over time into a monster of a folder containing gigabytes of tracks, a lot of which are repeated, re-ripped, or named incorrectly, making it a nightmare to sort out afterwards.

Well, I fell victim to this syndrome, and as an attempt to beat this terrible disease, I decided to take the plunge and try and sort it out.

Six, yes, SIX months later, and I'm still 'sorting out my classics' - I have'nt even started on my chart/commercial/party/rock & indie stuff yet!

What makes it even more painful, is that only recently, I did a quick check on my folder with all my music in, just to see what difference I'd made, and I got this rather cheery message from my machine..

'This folder contains 158GB of Data'
'28,889 Files'

Looks like it's going to be a very long Summer for me too!

Till next time, Keep on Clubbing, and Be Safe
DK.

Back To The Future?..

2009-05-05T22:40:00.000+01:00

Blimey these social networking/stalking sites are catching on aren't they?

I find myself spending hours every day browsing many different social networking sites, be it Bebo, Twitter, FaceBook or MSN whatsitcalled, often achieving nothing in the process. I blame my genetic urge to find out what's going on in the world.

That said, it just goes to show how quickly the world we live in has changed does'nt it, I mean, it was not even 5 years ago, letters were pushed aside for email, chatrooms were closed due to the increase of instant messaging, and now the infamous 'status updates' are keeping us all up to date with the latest knowledge.

At one time, we'd have to wait until the hour to find out what's going on in the world, now it seems the worlds media relies on the thoughts and opinions of various tweets and groups.

Flashmobs are the latest craze, YouTube makes mere mortals into megastars within days, and Scottish Singers become bigger singers than Mariah Carey simply because they had their hair done in a tumble dryer before going on TV.

You gotta love it though have'nt you, it just goes to show how much stuff there is 'out there' that keeps us all entertained, and I think without realising it, there's now something bigger than TV to keep us all occupied. Think about it, when was the last time you sat down in front of the TV for more than an hour?

When was the last time you 'recorded' a programme, bought an album in a shop, or even wrote a letter?

Here's a thought for you though..

When I was a kid, I remember seeing this old film (probably made in the late 50s/60s), something about a time machine or whatever, and the people in it decided to travel way into the future. Now when they got there, they came across libraries in this old deserted town, but when one of the characters tried to pick up a book off the shelf, it disintegrated due to it's extensive age.

We're moving very quickly into a fast, digital age. USB sticks are everywhere, everything comes with a memory card, and it's all quite cheap, and easy to get hold of. When was the last time you printed something out for yourself? - imagine in a few years when the whole world catches up...

There are Myths that the Egyptians were living in a higher technological era than the rest of the world, as were the Incas and the Aztecs. Well, if we stay 'all digital' and something ultra magnetic were to happen, some freaky monster EMP from space or something was to wipe out the whole planet, there wouldnt be much evidence of our existence in a few million years would there, well apart from a couple of dusty ZX81s, a Pink Floyd Album and an 'Only Fools & Horses' box set, well, maybe on DVDs that feature a bloke getting up to go to the loo every now and then.

I wonder if that's what happened to the Aztecs, Egyptians and that lot from Atlantis - maybe they Twittered themselves out of existence.

That movie I saw as a child is beginning worry me a little - the libraries are disappearing already.

So it could be worth printing something out every now and then, and keeping it safe, OK it might add an extra layer to your carbon footprint, but at least you'll have something to show for yourself when we're all gone...

There's A New Trend In Town...

2009-03-13T10:18:00.001Z

Whilst wandering in Halifax on Thursday night, I ventured into Lush in order to photograph the proceedings of an event for a friend, so they could add the images to their promotional material for the venue and maybe capture some of the atmosphere a little.

I doing so, I spent the good part of 5 hours wandering round the place, snapping clubbers, grabbing the usual crowd shots and getting the odd group here and there when I noticed a bizarre, yet alternative trend in dance music.

The music played was a very heavy, almost dub-like continuous selection of dance tracks which featured an extremely warpy and wobbily bassline, but unlike bassline music itself - the streetlike gangster references, rap bootlegs and rnb acapellas were nonexistent.

Some would say it's electro, others would say it's bassline, but I beg to differ, as unlike bassline, the whole ethos seemed more welcoming.

The girls were into it, and the lads were loving it, there was none of the apparent rivalry seen at some bassline events, and the sinister air of gang culture did'nt exist.

Along with the music came an unusual trend that seemed to expand throughout it's captive audience. Over the top haircuts were the order of the day, along with excessive use of the oversize string vest, odd yet seemingly practical in this hot, sweaty environment. The girls were dressed to kill and the guys were out for a good time. Yeah there were some wierd hand gestures, unexplainable fashion disasters and a creative use for glowing accessories, but the tongue in cheek approach was quite entertaining to experience.

The clientele appeared to be young, hip & trendy teenagers, twentysomethings and the kind of people you'd see nursing a hangover the next day behind a formica desk in an office, or a counter in your local garage, and unlike it's darker, urban counterpart, the somewhat expected whole chav culture was'nt there. The attitude was left at the door, and there was'nt a tracksuit or stripy sweater in sight.

I did'nt see a single incident all evening, and believe me, I covered every square foot in that building for the whole 5 hours, and despite the 'all inclusive' offer that was in place - they weren't there for the beer. When that door opened at 9pm until the lights went up at 2 in the morning, that dancefloor was rammed all night.

I could'nt see this working in many other places in Halifax because the music is way too deep for a lot of people to handle, I myself was'nt too keen on it myself (maybe I'm just getting old!) but I could'nt help but enjoy the atmoshpere.

This ladies and gentlemen will be the musical genre of the Summer, and I dunno what it is, but to me it's kinda like a 'White Mans Bassline'

It's deep, it's different, and you'll get very sweaty, so enjoy it while it lasts!

Website Updates, Pics and much more to come!..

2009-02-25T09:35:00.000Z

Blimmin eck! - I've been busy over the past few months!!

After burning many gallons of midnight oil, I've finally added some more stuff to the website, which include:

Cheeky! Radio
The test server is now up and running until the brand new shoutcast server comes into effect, I'm currently working on a weekly playlist that will ensure that the station broadcasts 24/7 - so you all get your required fix of classics!!

Portfolio
My photography section is now being updated, with all my new ideas and panoramic shots.

Halifax Guide
I've now started on my exclusive guide which features EVERY Halifax venue on the main circuit in greater detail, this included links to all of their sites and features hi-resolution photographs of what they all look like!

Website Portfolio
I'm now updating my previous sites, so potential clients can see examples of my previous work.

Coming Soon:
New stuff to appear on the site will include my tutorial section for all you wannabe producers, musicians and designers alike, so watch this space!

Well, I'm glad it's over for another week, I'm off back to bed!!
Night' y'all
DK.

How Much Work Does It Take To Get On Air!!!

2009-02-21T14:14:00.000Z

I can't believe I've dedicated an entire day to getting this damn radio server up and running!! - Seriously, it's driving me nuts!

Anyway, I'm sure with a bit more thought and some help from a couple of technically minded people, between us, we'll get there..

In the meantime, instead of letting my own feeble mind go into meltdown, I think I'll spend the rest of the afternoon working out the schedule for my new station.

I'm also sure that once the station is up and running, all this hard work will really be worth it, as I plan to make quite an effort to make sure that the content is just the right stuff that you guys (the Cheeky! regulars) get what you want!!

Wish me luck eh? - failing that, I'll just chuck myself in the canal again.

Speak soon y'all
DK.

Brasserie Website receives 10K hits within 2 weeks!

2009-02-13T10:11:00.000Z

I was in a bit of a shock this morning when upon viewing my inbox, I was greeted with the shocking news that one of my web clients websites had hit over 10,000 unique views in 2 weeks of this month!

This is great new for me as it's a great calling card for my website design services, the only problem is, that I now have to dig into the server and start optimizing pics and stuff so the bandwidth does'nt put the server into meltdown!

See the site for yourself here:
www.brasserieatthebull.co.uk

A Few Website Updates!

2009-02-05T08:47:00.000Z

Welcome to the new DK website! - I hope you like it, it's taken me long enough to get the damn thing up and running.

As you can imagine, due to the size of the site, there will be a few errors here and there, but I'm still working on it as we speak, or as they say in the industry 'The paints still drying so we cant put the pictures up yet'

Anyway, a few things are being added to the site, they are here already, but I havent made them live yet cause' they're not quite ready, these are;

1: The Mix CDs Section
Some mixes are up, I just have to add their own pages which will hold the CD inlays and track lists, so you know what you're downloading.

2: Halifax Clubbing Archive
This is a huge part of the site and there's a few more additions and pictures to include, plus the interactive guide, which will definetly take a while.

3: Tutorials
This section is also being put together, and it'll take a while before it's all proofed etc.

4: Portfolio
This section is more for my prospective clients, it's basically missing some of my more recent work - which is being resized for the site

5: Cheeky! Radio
The server's up but there's no input to it yet (I'm still having the machine built!) - please be patient!!

Apart from that, and the odd minor details, the site should be 100% within a couple of weeks

Is Halifax Finally Catching Up With The Rest Of The World?...

2009-02-05T08:38:00.000Z

Blimmin' eck! - we're into February already and for a change there's actually something happening in Halifax!

For a starter, there's 2 new venues up and running on our drinking circuit, and the music is not your stereotypical pop/rnb/electro bandwagon policy, hurray!!

Another major plus for Halifax is that both venues are independently owned - which means a couple of things:

1: More flexibility for the music range (no stupid music policies for DJ and customers to worry about)

2: More nights!! - something Halifax has been missing for a while - I know there's a couple already (Lush/Biscuitbar11 etc.) but now there's more than half a dozen in Halifax on a regular basis every month.

Now all this is going on, we should start seeing more people from out of town visiting us again, which means no more fierce competition between the venues fighting over our locals, bars can start tightening up their admission policies and we can get rid of the last remaining troublemakers.

Either way, I reckon we'll all benefit from this outcome.

These bars also fill in that horrible 'no mans land' in the centre of town where no-one dare walk, so hopefully town will be a lot safer.

If everything keeps running the way it is at the moment, we should hopefully have a cracking summer!

I'm looking forward to it already.

A New Year - Another New Look!

2009-01-29T06:15:00.000Z

Is it just me or did 2008 just simply fly by? Anyway, to be honest I'm not really all that concerned about last year, as there's really no time like the present to get things all organised and ready for the new year - hence this rather stunning new look to my website!.

As is happens, I'll be celebrating 5 years of the Cheeky! website this year - That's right FIVE!! can you believe it and whilst looking through the previous versions of Cheeky! in my archives, I've begin to realise that the website has kind of become an archive within itself, and as a result, it will become part of the new web archive.

Another of the articles I started at the very birth of the Cheeky! site is now beginning to yield some rather interesting information too. If anyone remembers the first Cheeky! site, then they'll definely remember the Halifax Archives section which described in great detail how Halifax has changed over the years. Well, 5 years on, we now have information covering the Halifax clubscene which goes as far back as 1994 - that's nearly 15 years of clubbing history.

As you can imagine, this section of the site is quite big, so for the time being it's currently offline until I've updated all of the venues (new and old) so please be patient with this bit (no emails saying stuff like 'the venues bit doesnt work!..' ok?)

Part of the old Cheeky! website used to feature an interactive flash guide to the town centre too - something which started out as one of my many projects I have when I'm learning a new application, and now I'm a bit more clued up on Flash, this guide will return and become part of the clubbers archive section.

As well as all this, I've also decided to upload EVERY single mix compilation I've ever done, which means there's over 40 free mixes available online!! (did someone just say 'free music?..')

I've finally got round to sorting out the radio server too - so with any luck, once the site's up, the radio server will be up and running too.

Roll on February, and let's get 2009 up and running with style eh?

Results and Resolutions

2009-01-02T17:28:00.000Z

So, it’s officially 2009, the headache’s just about worn off and I’ve recovered from another 2 months of the festive silly season!. Some of you may have noticed that I’ve been out of the festive limelight this year, and there’s been other people in my place at the various bars in Halifax.

This is mainly due to a very early booking which was made way back in the summer of 2008 when I was booked to play all of December at new venue on Georges Square - Namely ‘The Brasserie at The Bull’ so as December went, I spent most of my time there working through a mountain of bookings, which included the New Year..

Anyway - moving on, it appears that I’m in for a busy year in 2009 as not only will I be kicking off my events again, I’m venturing into the hectic world of musical production, soundtracks and remixing. This means that my current setup need a little modifying in order to keep the quality of any work I do to the best standards as possible, so here’s my resolutions for 2009 - mainly aimed at me getting my act together and adding some kind of organisation to my life for a change!..

Redesign/rewire and upgrade the production studio
Organise my online profiles
Get this website sorted out!
Keep my blog up to date
Get Cheeky! up and running again…

oh, and pay off a few bills while I’m at it..

Let’s see how far into this list I can get before 2010 eh?

2008 is nearly over, But will all be fine in 2009?...

2008-12-22T17:33:00.000Z

So another year, another hangover - but how long wil it take us to shake off our post 2008 blues and get back on the circuit?

Our ‘recovery period’ seems to be getting longer and longer - either because we’re spending more during the festive period, or there’s simply nothing worth coming into town to see.

Don’t know what I’m talking about? - Well, here’s something that’ll hopefully shed a little light…

We all know that during Christmas and the New Year, once we’ve counted down the last seconds of the previous year, the fireworks have finished and we’ve all shook each others hands and given out the complimentary drunken cuddles to our friends and drunken randoms, there’s usually a slight delay before people venture back into town. We’re also somewhat lighter in the financial side of things and naturally, the British weather does’nt help either as one often finds that as soon as the calendar hits January, that once highly sought after ‘White Christmas’ decides to show up, usually as we’re trying to get back from our first days at work - thus grinding the whole country to a standstill in the process.

Anyway, back to my original point - over the years, it takes roughly on average, about 3-4 weeks before people start showing up in our town centres, with their hard earned cash back in their wallets, and an eagerness to get completely wasted on drinks fortified with E-Numbers and cheap spirits.

Back in 2008 though, I did notice that, some of the bars and clubs were’nt picking up until at least February - some still looking a little vacant even beyond February, which when you think about it, that’s over 2 months. Is it because the bars are too expensive, or there’s simply not enough entertainment value in the bars anymore, or could it just be that everyone pulled last year, and there was really no need to go out until Valentines day?

A lack of bars making it past the Festive period did’nt help either - by the time we’d hit February, The Theatre Nightclub had gone under, Silvers was closed, Apollos/Nemesis was shut down and Xess didnt even exist - all before this credit crunch we’re currently experiencing…

All I can add now, is either thing’s will get better this year, or I can’t really be optimistic about seeing our regulars in Halifax until they’ve finished paying for their Easter Eggs first…

Sign of the times?

2008-10-10T17:38:00.000+01:00

I was working in a rock bar not so long ago, covering for one of the guys for the night when this woman came to the DJ stand and started giving me grief for not playing ‘proper rock music’

To be honest, I can fully understand her opinion of the music I was playing, after all, I was working in an environment which is relatively new to me (I know very little about Rock) and that my music wasnt exactly suitable for the venue or to her taste, hence her coming forward to voice her somewhat detailed opinion to what I should be playing, and why I should be playing it.

However, it wasnt her complaint that made me come to writing this piece, it was more of the fact that I noticed her age.. She wasnt exactly in the prime of her life, if anything, she’d probably passed that at 100mph three decades ago.

So if this is a sign of things of things to come, I can only imagine that in a world where we begin to live longer, and party harder - Here’s a couple of things I forsee in the near future:

Nursing homes be populated by senior citizens covered in tribal bands and tattoos, At 50th Birthday Parties, the requests of the evening will consist mainly of RnB, Electro and Bassline. Will we be subjected to hearing people saying “I remember these when they first came out on ITunes” and Wallace Arnold will be doing coach trips to Creamfields.

You may think it’s funny, and yes, laugh all you will, but I bet it’s only a matter of time before it happens - just remember this..The next time you see a lady in a smoke filled nightclub dressed in neon, furry boots and blowing kisses at the DJ - don’t ask her out until you’ve made sure that the twenty-something clubbers dancing round her arent her kids.Don’t say I did’nt warn you…

A DJ's selection of annoying top tips

2008-10-10T17:35:00.000+01:00

Everyone likes to give advice or voice an opinion, especially to us DJs - and we usually get these golden pearls of wisdom while we’re working, and sometimes it often comes from another DJ that is’nt.

If you would like to feel like ‘one of us’ and really fit in with the DJ community, here’s a really useful guide to getting it right first time..

A TIP TOP TIP LIST FOR ALL YOU CUSTOMERS AND WANNABES ALIKE:

1: Ask for a mix, we’re always looking for somebody to show us how to do it properly.

2: You’re an MC? - Excellent, we’d love to stop what we’re doing right now and get you to show off your skills to the entire building.

3: You can scratch too? - Brilliant, you’re just what we’ve been looking for, someone to use our records and rip the living daylights out of them.

4: We don’t have the record/s you’re requesting - of course we’ll wait till you nip home quickly to bring it/them so we can play it for you, or even better, bring some CDs with you next time and we’ll play the lot just for you.

5: You sing this song all the time on the mic? - Excellent, here, take my mic now and we’ll let you sing the song, make it your own and we’ll all stand in awe as you turn an already well made, chart topping track into something really special - we wont even bat an eyelid when you forget the words due to the tenth sambuca you’ve had starting to melt your brains into pulp.

6: Make sure we are always taking the music in the right direction by telling us what to play next - especially if there’s ‘no one dancing to this’ We often forget what to do and we’re always needing someone to remind us what to do.

7: You’re going in 4 minutes?? - Well why didnt you say so, we’ll happily put your song on immediately regardless if we’ve either played it already/its a drum & bass track and we’re in the middle of a party set/it’s absolutely shite…

8: You’re a better DJ than I am, well you’d have to be to be able to break away from your own set to give me hassle while I try and do mine…

Plastic Dreams...

2008-09-26T17:39:00.000+01:00

Well, as most of you will probably know, I made the step forward from odl analogue technology into the realm of digital gadgets and CDJ madness, and in order to meet certain requirements of the digital world, I purchased one of them vinyl to mp3 gadgets, ie a deck with a USB cable that literally rips the track into the shadowy depths of your pc hard disc.

“Very handy, saves me messing about with plugging a deck into a mixes, getting the levels right and running the gauntlet with loose crackles and of course the dreaded ‘jumping needle’ that you get with old analogue technology” I think to myself with a sneer similar to someone who’s just purchased the latest in High Definition televisual entertainment who laughs at people who cant even receive channel 5..

Thing is, in order to rip these tracks, I have to sit by this record deck and listen to every track as it records, praying desperately that the needle never jumps (one of the key reasons why I upgraded to digital technology in the first place…) or that the stylus doesnt accumulate that much fur and dust, the final track sounds like its been sung through a sock.

I won’t be the first to admit it, but it’s a bit of a nuisance having to sit through EVERY single track as it records, and in extreme circumstances having to re-set the deck to re-record any track that should have any audio fault with it - but it’s while I’m sat here, doing this in a room surrounded by numerous timeless tracks, crackling away on the deck that made me realise something, something that, over time as the digital age takes over, will be something that will eventually be lost in the past forever…

Do you remember when you bought your first record, CD or even an album on cassette? - I know I do, when you dig through your record collections at home (before you sacrifice your soul to the digital era as I have..) there’s a certain feeling of ‘belonging’ as you come across certain tracks.

For example, as I was ‘ripping’ my vinyl copy of Awesome 3′ ‘Dont Go’ my mind was flooded with memories of walking through Halifax Town Centre just to pick up this track that I’d pre-ordered, in the rain to my local record shop - hell I even remember some random guy getting shouted at because he walked out in front of a cyclist while trying to cross the road..

Do you remember the first track you downloaded or received through soulseek, was there the same feeling of elation when you finally received that vital track in your ‘My Music’ folder - I can’t imagine the memories are quite as personal can you?

After all, there’s no such thing as a limited-edition test pressing download on coloured vinyl is there?

You know you're a * DJ when..

2008-09-19T17:44:00.000+01:00

Regulars of my various profile sites on social networks will remember this one, it’s an old classic I wrote some time ago, and now the new blog’s up - I thought I’d add it here, with a few improvements..

What kind of DJ are you?…
You know you’re a bedroom DJ when…

* You think Technics decks are the dogs bollocks, even though you’ve never used them.
* You have, at some point owned a Numark or Vestax Mixer.
* The best needles are ‘concordes’ even though their real name is a Stanton Trackmaster - and yes, you’ve never used them either…
* You play Bounce, Bassline or Hard House.
* You think mics are rubbish, MCs are cool and you’re not a DJ unless you can scratch..
* Your mate is an MC.
* Your world ends if you screw up a mix, and its usually your mates fault for MC’ing over the mix, hence ‘putting you off’
* You’re better than any of the DJs that work in the bars in town, even though if you were offered a slot in one of them you’d shit yourself…
* You’re too cool to take requests, regardless of no matter what your MC mate asks you for, you probably would’nt have it anyway..
* You think the Gain knob on the mixer is a slang term for ‘Extra Volume’
* You wear ‘witty’ shirts or have DJ equipment such as slipmatts that refer to your job with innuendos like “DJ’s Do It With 12 Inches” or “Fuck Off I’m Mixing”
* Everything has your name on it - including your slipmatts..

You know you’re a commercial DJ when…

* You’ve never used any decks, cause all your tracks are on CD - or a laptop.
* You mix tracks by simply fading one into another, talking over the mix as you do so…
* You do requests - especially for girls with large breasts.
* You’re at least in your 30’s
* You do a ‘party set’
* You have every tune known in the common universe, however 90% of them never get played due to your venues ‘music policy’
* You remember the days when ‘town was a lot busier’
* You know what a ‘Get Out Of Jail Free Card’ is..
* When you’re not working, you use your witty comebacks as conversation. A lot.
* The last time you had a real night out was when you were a barman, and didnt give a fuck about what the DJ was playing just like everyone does’nt today.

You know you’re a Dance DJ when…

* You’ve ‘had this track for ages, months before it even came out’ even though no-one really gives a shit.
* You think the whole club has come to see you, not their mates…
* You can mix tracks with surgical precision, and never drop a beat - and you get annoyed cause no-one ever notices, until you fuck it up that is..
* You NEVER use a mic, you talk with your tunes…
* You think party DJs are cunts who get paid too much, cant mix and work in the wrong places.
* ‘DON’T TALK TO ME WHILE I’M IN A MIX!!!…’
* You think it’s cool to wear the trendiest outfits, even though no-one can see you anyway cause you’re either hidden by the smoke machine or your head’s stuck near the monitor speaker so you can get that mix perfect…
* Your girlfriend, if you have one - thinks she owns the fucking place.

You know you’re a Radio DJ when…

* You have to time what you’re saying to the exact second of when a track breaks.. Something you do even when you’re in a car and the radio’s on..
* You don’t DJ - You ‘Drive’
* You hate silence - even if it’s for a split second.
* You point out every other DJ’s mistakes - right down to when they fumble a single word.
* You seem overjoyed when another Jock gives out an incorrect name for a track that’s just played - despite the fact that it was probably only you that noticed..
* You say that radio DJ’s talk too much - even though you do it yourself.
* You can’t tell a joke to save your life.
* You think its necessary to tell the world who wrote the track you’re playing, when it came out and what the remixers dogs name is..
* You cant and won’t mix.
* You go ’shhhhh’ and put you hand up a split second before you say something, as if you were live on air.

You know you’re a function DJ when…

* You need a van to set up.
* Your sound system is ‘better than most bars in town’
* You have you’re own ‘laser’
* You own at least 1 megamix which gets played ‘while everyone gets to know each other’
* You own ever track ever made ‘just in case someone asks for it’
* You panic when someone asks for The Prodigy
* You get paid more than any of the other DJs in this list.
* Everything you own comes in either Black, Grey or Stucco - with chrome handles.
* You own a ‘cube’
* You have a taste for sausage rolls, quiche and Vol au Vents.
* You think old people shouldnt sit near bass bins.

And finally..

Before all the hatemail comes in from discruntled DJs or punters alike, I’d like to clear a few things up first..

1: I have or have done, in the past most of the things listed in this article..
2: I know the correct term for the ‘concordes’ is not Trackmaster, but then what would I know - I’ve never used them :D
3: I really don’t care.

Is it the end of clubbing, or just the beginning?..

2008-09-19T17:41:00.000+01:00

Well, it’s a bizzare post to write I guess - but it’s something that’s been bothering me for quite some time - and due to me witnessing this phenomenon first hand, I’m sure some of you may agree with me on this one.

This may start a debate or two - but I guess there’s only one way to find out;

Oh well, here goes…

One of the biggest cultures of the United Kingdom is not the proms, our football heritage or the Queens speech at Christmas - it’s our passion for one of probably our most important social activity, namely the art of the traditional British night out.

Sounds like a big statement - but think of it in greater detail, Without british clubbing culture - House music would still be in the States, There would be no Ibiza, No package holidays and definetly no nightclubs.

Well, as a lot of you may have seen this already, some of you first hand through working experience, and some of you as clubbers but is it just me or has clubbing gone a bit ‘too’ corporate?

The bars are dying, the clubs are emptying, numbers are down by their millions due to a simple law that makes it illegal to smoke a cigarette..

Taxes and restrictions on alcohol are now at an extorionate rate, and to add insult to injury - now we can’t drink as much or smoke we can visit a club for longer hours.

It just does’nt make sense. I forsee a ‘domino effect’ already - beer taxes are on the increase so venues are passing this extra expense onto us the clubbers, the cost of a night out has tripled because of this and as a result the attendance figures of clubs are lower than they have ever been.

Bars all over the country are paying less for entertainment, charging more for drinks and no-longer concentrating on what matters most - giving the client (the customer) a better night out. As a result, smaller venues are suffering and people are seeing venues closing in their dozens within a matter of months.

It started with the working mens clubs eariler this year due to the smoking ban, but now it’s reached us - namely the clubbers.

I forsee a future where buying alcohol illegally will take over the drugs trade due to extortionate tax laws, smoking is treated as a class B drug and music is limited to the level in which it’s played.

The health and safety brigade will eventually get their own way and smoke machines will be outlawed because it obscures people’s vision and it will be a threat to their well-being..

We will be drinking out of paper cups because plastic isnt biodegradable enough and all music will be censored so it doesnt offend anyone.

Amongst all this, singing and dancing will be seen as a risk to the safety of others and premises will be pressured to keep it under control.

As a result, people will resort to hosting sercret underground parties where smoking, taking drugs and drinking whatever they want will be commonplace, where the music will be unrestricted and played at whatever level the organisers feel is fit to do so.

Sound familiar? - well cast your minds back to the late 80’s and early 90’s…

Ladies and gentlemen, clubbing is about to turn full circle all over again - so much for society moving into the future eh?

You mark my words boys and girls - I’ve seen the future, and it happened 20 years ago.

My final words to the Government are thus;

Charge whatever you want for a packet of cigarettes, steal all our hard earned cash via your so-called ‘taxes’ - fine us for smoking if you want to..

But keep your thieving, greedy hands off the only thing that England has remaining, our beacon to people - to which half of the planet looks up to for reference and as an example of how to ‘do it right’..

Leave the traditional British ‘night out’ alone.

It’s the only thing we’ve got left to look forward to the weekend for.

A spot of morning mathematics...

2008-09-12T17:52:00.000+01:00

Don’t ask me why but for some reason I had a bit of a deep thinking session this morning when I got out of bed.

I was wondering to myself (as I often do) how long I have left in me to live in the world we all refer to as clubland, so while I had a spare moment in hand I decided to work it out…

Using these basic figures, I came up with the following, and I’m sure you’ll find the figures rather interesting…

* There are 52 weeks in a year, so thats 110 main evenings (Fridays and Saturdays)
* Each year has 5 Bank Holiday Sundays
* Plus my Birthday
* I’m 32 years old
* The average clubber continues clubbing until they hit approx 40 years old.

So, I have:

* 8 Years left in me.
* Thats 40 Bank Holiday Sundays
* Thats 416 Weekends
* 208 Friday or Saturday nights
* Plus 8 Birthdays
* Of which only 4 will fall on a weekend.
* I drink on average 8 pints in a weekend and consume roughly 6 Sambucas
* Thats 3328 Pints and 2496 Sambucas (at 32 shots in a bottle, thats 78 bottles!)

And at the end of it all - I’ve worked out that it would take roughly 3744 hours to recover from the hangover (That’s 156 days)

No wonder I feel rough this morning.

Silvers changes colour - again...

2008-02-11T17:57:00.000Z

Silvers, commonly known as the old Coiners bar on Silver Street on Halifax is to change it’s name - again!

The bar, which is becoming a bit of a nightmare venue for many bar managers is to change it’s name and management again. This time it’s losing it’s Silvers name and changing colour to.. Bar Rouge, or Rouge.

The new owners, who currently own La Salsa & Barbarellas, also situated on Silver Street plan to make the venue into a wine bar & restaurant. The plans for the top floors of the premises are still unknown.

The previous names of the venue have been: Silvers (2006-Present Day), Nv (2002-2005) and it’s name which still stands as its most popular remembered monicker, Coiners (1995 - 2002).

A brief cameo for the angels!...

2008-02-11T17:55:00.000Z

The Halifax Street Angels, a local volunteer service which patrols the streets of Halifax on a regular basis have included some footage of Dannie presenting an intro to their 3 minute street report on the Street Angels website. The organisation aids the police and other local authorities in maintaining the streets of the Town Centre every weekend. Dealing with incidents such as informing the police about revellers who are voilent towards other members of the public.

Recently they were in Halifax with their cameras and they passed the Cell bar on Georges Square and Dannie happened to be having a cigarette break at the time, so they asked him to do a quick take for their video - which they eventually used at the beginning and end of the footage.

The video can be seen here: http://video.google.co.uk/videoplay?docid=4833755469912183589

Jessica has arrived!...

2007-11-08T17:58:00.000Z

Well guys and girlies, after many days of anticipation, and a lengthy stay in hospital for the missus, Baby Jessica finally arrived at 12.21pm on Wednesday afternoon.

She’s in great health and weighed in at a whopping 8.01lb!!

I’d like to say a massive thanks to everyone who send messages of good luck and we’re sorry we couldnt answer everyones calls due to our long stay at the hospital.

But once again I’m a dad for the second time, and no doubt I’ll be in Halifax soon celebrating the occasion with Sara alongside me.

Thanks again